"it's been fun." seriously? that's all you can say after all this time? after everything? yeah asshole, it's been real fun.

No one ever reads this shit anymore

But it's okay. It's the new years. Things have been happening. And Orchard Road has been decorated breathtakingly. I can't help but to want to write something down. Here it is.


Something's been keeping me grounded on your land. The "no trespassing" sign was warning enough but I'm stubborn and I get what I want. But is that you anymore? I don't want to push you away until I'm tired of you, but lately the distance has been taking its toll. We're growing but not together. We're changing but not for the better. This could last. Every inch of heart put into this shattered piece of love can't be glued back together. The affection's nothing but dust now. So let's rebuild. We can love beyond barriers of our own perception. so take every wall down. I'll hold you up if that's what you need. I'll give you space if that's what you need. I'd give you everything if that's what you need. I'd swallow the ocean for you, I'd take everyone out of my life for you. As long as you want me around. I would sob my entire life out. you'll never be mine. really mine. I thought maybe this time would be different, but I don't have the guts to mention a word and you don't feel a thing. so, I am back to where I was a year ago. if this is going to tear me apart let me know now. I can walk away looking better than ever and I can pretend as if you never breathed on my neck, or better yet in my presence. You could be nothing to me. someone's dying to use me and I'd let them. I won't be your rock if you won't be mine. something about you keeps me holding on, I can't grasp it and I'd never come close to comprehending it. but i can handle my own. I can give up and leave, I can lie, I can not give a damn, and I can be as withholding as you've been. I'm not giving you an ultimatum and I never would. I just need to know what you want. I'll give you anything you'll ever want.

Heading back to Kl for christmas and new years!!!!!!!
love love. can't wait to see yu guys! even though have of you has been scattered around the world already, but it's okay. COME BACK NOW AND SEE ME!

Heading back down to KL for a break this saturday till next week! Whee! I can't wait!!!!! I missed my friends so terribly ! Justin's picking me up from the airport, hope things wont get any weirder.

Sweet Sweet.

Motivation to my heartbreaker friends on the other side of the country. (:

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider freeways , but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness. We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much , and pray too seldom.We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things. We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less. These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete... Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side. Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent. Remember, to say, "I love you" to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you. Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again. Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind. And always remember: life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. --George Carlin

So I have pretty much settled in.. in my own apartment, big thanks to Jules and Shin. (: I never felt so free in my life, even though my parents never had controlled over me back in Malaysia.. but this time, I'm all alone. And you wanna know something? The feeling is great! Sure, I feel the need of depending on someone every once in awhile, like to wash my clothes, buy me groceries and etc. But hey, I've learned to do it on my own. Thats what life is all about, right? Independent. And I'm enjoying every minute of it!

My uni starts in bout a week.I can't wait for that too.

I miss you guys terribly at home, I'm currently using my new awesome pink laptop you guys have bought for me. Even though it wasn't really necessary! but geee, thanks a bunch anyway. (:
I love you guys heaps!